Updated: Jun 8, 2018
- Athena Narsingh, Blogger and Coordinator for Jewel Events (November 2017)
Wedding planning is extremely stressful! There’s so much to do: the financial burden, the emotional rollercoaster, considering other people’s feelings, the deadlines, making sure your guests RSVP, making decisions between a million options – it can be overwhelming. We have some tips on how to handle your stress, but first off, why do you want to make sure you handle your stress?
You don’t want to break out. This doesn’t need further elaboration – no one likes acne.
You’re probably juggling work, school and/or children. You can’t afford to be stressed out.
You want to keep your family and friends in your life. Yes, this is your wedding day, but this is just one or two days in your entire life. You don’t want to lose friends and family because you went “bridezilla” on everyone. These people are there for you because of a close relationship you have; you will need them again in your life, so don’t let your wedding stress ruin it.
Most importantly, the reason you’re getting married is because you love your partner (or he/she is rich), either way, you don’t want to lose them. Yes, your intention is forever, but we’ve seen relationships fall apart for good over the stress of wedding planning.
Here are some tips on how to handle the different causes of wedding stress:
Too much to do. Plan. Organize a list of tasks you have to do. For example, picture your wedding day and reception. Walk through the day and list all the things you need. From there make a list of what you need to do to get these things done. You’re picturing your bouquet; now find your floral vendors. Lists help a lot.
Other people’s opinions. Often weddings aren’t just about the bride and groom. Maybe their parents have a say, or a sibling, or an aunt that lives across the continent. How do you manage their opinions? Know when to step up or step down. Sometimes, if you know you want their opinion because you care or because your family dynamics require their opinion, pick your battles. You know there are certain “must haves” for you, like red rose petals, but you don’t care what colour the linen is. If your mom wants white linens, then leave it be. You stand your ground for your red rose petals!
The in-laws. This could fall under point number 2, but let’s be real, it needs its own sub-heading. When you first meet your future in-laws, they are absolutely lovely! A little while after, you start calling your partner’s mom, “mom” and she’s packing your lunches, cooking your favourite dinners and supporting all your decisions as a couple. Then the wedding comes, and now you have to call her “Mrs. Smith”, you starve at her house and she has an opinion about everything. Why? Because it’s her child’s wedding and she wants in on the decisions – just like your family. It can be overwhelming. Remember, the less tension, the better. These are going to be your in-laws for the rest of your life. Compromise. If your in-laws have an opinion on how things should go, hear them out and compromise, or if you don’t want to, find a political way of declining their idea. For example, your future mother-in-law wants you to wear this hideous dress she picked out. Well, you can say no, but opt for those earrings she liked. And then tell her how important the earrings are to the dress. Compromise and still keeping the peace.
Dealing with different personalities. Remember that some people don’t mind the straight forward response, while others need to be spoken to more delicately. Maybe the hall manager is a little rough, that’s ok. It’s just their personality. You can be stern but try to be understanding with different personalities. Your actions will define their reactions. If everyone stays calm, then plans go smooth, and you aren’t stressed.
Your partner. There are going to be a ton of decisions about venues, vendors, colours, everything, and the stress keeps piling on. Decide on your roles. Will someone take the lead and delegate tasks or will you make decisions together? Decide which decisions are necessary to be made as a couple and which can be divided tasks. Some of these decisions do not need to be made together, so if your partner doesn’t care if you have red or white wine, but you do, then don’t bother them with that detail. This is going to be a serious test of your relationship, so keep communicating with each other, keep being supportive and take time out to take care of each other, like a spa day or dinner. Most importantly, keep respecting each other.
The whole thing. The whole wedding planning requires an immense amount of time and commitment. If you’re busy or it’s too stressful, hire a wedding planner. They know how to take care of you. Wedding planners can be for the entire process, or part of the process, or just the day of the wedding. You have options to help you through.
Wedding planning isn’t easy. Heck, meal plans for the week aren’t easy. At Jewel Events, we were born to plan so let us help you organize your special day to keep you stress-free!